A Yankees Fan's Take on: The Rivalry

I hate to say I told you so... but I did say it. In 2004, the worst thing that can or will ever happen to a sports fan happened to me. Of course we all know that I am talking about the Red Sox coming back from down 3-0 to defeat the Yankees in the ALCS. This was also the last time I ever experienced the emotion known as anger. I have not been angry since because I have not been able to. In South Park, Cartman once blew a funny fuse, claiming that seeing people with asses for faces were the funniest thing he was ever going to see, and therefore could not laugh. The 2004 ALCS was the most enfuriating thing I will ever experience and therefore I cannot express rage. Getting back to the first line of the blog and what I had predicted; at one point during that series after I had destroyed my room and threw around my couch like it was a shot-put, I went into my dorm's common room, amidst the droves of "Red Sox fans" (I put Red Sox fans in quotes because it was mostly bandwagon jumpers, fairweather fans, or Mets fans. After all, rooting for the Red Sox and against the Yankees was the trendy thing to do at the time and I apparently had been associating with sheep rather than free-thinking independent individuals) and said "just wait... if the Red Sox win this thing, their fans will be much worse than Yankees fans could ever be. The Red Sox winning this would be a terrible terrible thing. most of you will hate them within 2 years." Low and behold, the Red Sox gaytion (see what I did there?) has swept the nation and infested every visiting city far worse than Yankees fans ever will. Alleged Red Sox fans have been coming out of the woodwork. There can only be two possible causes to this sudden outbreak of Red Sox nation:

1) People who didn't really follow baseball, who may have either been from New England or know a person or animal or have ever been to New England, suddenly became a diehard Red Sox fan because they were finally good.

2) Hypnosis. Its simple really, you're a baseball fan in Flint, MI but not really particularly loyola to any team. Despite Flint being particularly close to Detroit, where the Tigers play, you walk into a local convenience store, and see a display of Red Sox hats and keychains. Wait a minute, you think, I must be supposed to like them. I'm nowhere near Boston, yet there's a ton of Boston merchandise here, it must be a sign from God. Not once does this fan begin to think it might be Satan who is behind this charade. Whatever dark force is behind this attempt to capture the mind's of unsuspecting passers-by, recently tried to brainwash me, IN NEW YORK OF ALL PLACES! I was strolling around the grocery store, in the produce section, when I see a display of Boston Red Sox peanuts. Naturally, I was baffled. It wasn't until about 30 seconds later that I realized that there were not any Yankees peanuts. The store hadn't bothered. Such is life though.

I am writing this entry because the Yankees and Red Sox are beginning a 3-game series at Fenway tonight, and with one hell of a pitching matchup at that: Joba Chamberlain vs. Josh Beckett. The season series at this moment is 5-4 Red Sox. I expect this series to be very memorable and hopefully ignite a shift in the balance of power in favor of the Yankees.

I also would like to take this opportunity to urde those of you who might comment on this blog that I understand that this is a very biased opinion, one that only a Yankees fan would share. It is simply a look into my world as Yankees fan since that horrible week in 2004 when my sports world was turned upside down. Thanks for listening...

-Carm

P.S. Beating New England in the Super Bowl and spoiling their perfect season has managed to soothe a good amount of the pain.

A Disturbing New Trend

I received an email today that contained this picture:


I was both shocked and terrified. However this picture got me wondering if this was the next great congratulatory movement in sports. Think about the first guy that ever got a firm palm on his ass after hitting a home run. I bet he knocked the slapper out. However, many more questionable characters in various league dugouts figured this was their only chance to get some hand to ass time and before we knew it, the ass slap was expected as payment for a good play. While these two fine gentlemen did not start this trend… (Credit Brady Quinn)


They were the first to implement this move into an actual game setting. Before these two bold gentlemen showed their affection in public, a move like this was just used in practice, or South Bend social settings.

Regardless, we may be witnessing the dawning of a new era in sports. One in which grabbing a guys ass just doesn’t quite tell him how pumped up you are. No, pretty soon if you really want to show him you are a good teammate you grab his cock.

Enough! I mean, how far does this go? In 2020 are we going to see players getting blown after a diving catch? This isn’t the California PENAL league. Slap your teammate on the ass, and wait until you get in the locker room to grab shaft.

-Reed